Junior went to go sleep at his Aunties last night. I was anxious because he’s never had a sleepover before with out me or my Hubby, or been at his Nanas. Junior has always had sleepovers at his Nanas, without any problems, but she is a huge influence in his life.
Last night couldn’t of got any worse. Junior had two epic meltdowns. I honestly don’t think he knew what to do when he was there. He got left alone with Alfie Bear and his older Cousin, this was a huge trigger. Junior needs a adult to keep him inline, otherwise he feels his responsible and will choose to take on that adult role. Anyone that gets in his way then God help them. This is exactly what happened. He calmed down eventually. I then got a phone call, he had another meltdown. I picked him up and then put him to bed. He went straight to sleep. I feel bad for Junior. I don’t know if he intentionally ruins things for himself or if it’s all too much, and fight or flight kicks in.
Then today we finally managed to persuade Junior to get a haircut. He was starting to look like a orphan. His usual hairdresser was busy so we went to the one next door. Cue Juniors comments. “Mum have you seen the state of this place” “mum there’s hair all over, I can’t even put my feet down its gross” he had every excuse not to have his hair cut. At these times I get quite embarrassed, junior sounds so disrespectful. I can see people giving Junior sidewards glances during his rant. Luckily we didn’t have to wait long.
Then finally, finally, after 20 mins of a full scale rant. Junior loved his hair cut. He was all smiles. He loved the lady who cut his hair. And check this out he loved it that much he doesn’t want any one else to do his hair again!!! He was all smiles after that!
We then had a family day down the beach. We had the odd hiccup. The usual punch ups between the boys. The shouting. Arguments. Junior telling us all and everyone else what to do, and pointing out what we are doing wrong. The stares and tuts from other people. But do you know what today I couldn’t give a shit. We did the best we could, we handles situations the best we could. And I blocked out everyone else successfully. Go me.
I still need to learn to handle my stress better. My tolerance levels are still low. I try I really do. This is the part were I feel shit, when I lose my shit and we go round in circles.we get stuck in this cycle. When we scream at each other. When he throws things at me, I have to take time out. I can’t deal with that shit! It feels like sometimes we are best friends or worst enemy’s there is no inbetween. 💙